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Husbands and Wives Unite!


After my wife and I got married, we learned something that should have been obvious: She and I are very different. She is spontaneous, I like to plan. I need details, she is doesn't. You can imagine how things go when we tried to run a household with such drastic differences. I like to plan, which became impossible when she would constantly disrupt my plan. The problem was actually that it was my plan, not our plan. We learned after many disagreements and disappointments, that we must communicate with one another and work together. We must make time and sit down together and talk about our lives; our dreams, goals, fears, our childhood, the way we were raised; all of these things and more are things that shape our lives.

Once we learned to work together, we were able to plan our lives together. This not only improved our finances, but improved our marriage as well. Communication allows husband and wife to mesh their strengths together, creating a bond that magnifies their collective strengths and minimizes individual weaknesses.

Imagine if you could let someone else do the things that you are not good at. This is possible when husband and wife work together effectively.

Advantages of working together:

  • Income - if both spouses are working outside the home, the ceiling for income is higher. Two can earn more than one.

  • Economies of Scale - Many expenses need to be paid only once. For example: A married couple living together need only one refrigerator, one electricity bill… Singly, many expenses would overlap.

  • Knowledge - Each of the two of you have learned and experienced things independently of the other. This wealth of knowledge, when communicated and shared properly, should minimize mistakes.

  • Accountability - Your spouse should be able to hold you accountable for your actions. You have someone that you have to look in the eye and explain your actions - causing you to think twice before making decisions.

  • Backup - one spouse should be able to pick up the slack for the other.

  • Skills - Each has a unique set of skills and talents. As a couple, all bases should be covered. Allows each spouse to focus on what they are stronger at. Between the two, the couple should be able to excel in all things.

Take Action: I challenge you and your spouse to try these four action steps. You will be surprised with the results.

  • Date night - set regular date nights to spend time with your spouse

  • Set aside a block of uninterrupted time with your spouse, talk about your dreams, goals, hopes, fears and weaknesses. Talk about the goals and dreams that you have for your family.

  • Write a mission statement for your family - develop a clear vision for your family and measure your decisions against this mission.

  • Commit to making all major decisions together

Amos 3:3 Two cannot walk together unless they agree.

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